Sexual Abuse, Spiritual Healing and Conscious Evolution

Sexual abuse is something few people can just let roll off their backs, so please understand that I'm not saying it's necessarily worse for Empaths. I'm writing from this perspective because I happen to have been sexually abused, and I happen to be an Empath; and I happen to have come through it brilliantly and would like to share that hope with others who are still struggling with it. Certainly, some of this information can apply to anyone, so if you're not an Empath and have found your way here, perhaps you should read along anyway.


Why was I sexually abused?

You cannot subscribe to the belief system I subscribe to and apply the principles at random. There is no logic in that, and it would be ridiculous to try and make it so. Therefore, my reality is that I chose to experience such a thing. And before you wonder if that's a fair or healthy perspective; it's an incredibly empowering one. Perhaps this perspective is not your reality for your particular situation, but I have accepted that it is mine. Does this mean I "wanted" to be sexually molested by my father as a child? Of course not. It means that I chose to experience something profoundly painful in order to learn how that pain felt -- and to learn how to overcome it. Both are equally important facets, but few of us succeed with the latter. It took me more than 25 years, but I have done it, and so I tell you that you can do it, too.


This is all part of my spiritual evolution.

As I just explained, this is all part of my conscious, spiritual evolution. Does this mean I'm completely cool with my father now? No, and I'm not keen on thinking about him, either. As it happens, we haven't spoken for several years now (for unrelated reasons) and this makes it easier for me, to be sure. If I had to live in the same city and see him on a regular basis, this would probably disturb me on some level as well -- just because I've overcome the pain aspect and moved forward, doesn't mean I don't still feel a bit skeevy when I see him. However, please don't think that my overcoming this challenge (and that is precisely what it's always been meant to be) is a result of geographical convenience. I haven't lived anywhere near my father since childhood, and I assure you I was nowhere near capable of coping with this until semi-recently.


Why Being An Empath Can Complicate Things

As an Empath, you're already primed to suck in the emotions of those around you. If you're an Empath with, let's call it baggage, you're not at the top of your game as far as controlling this sponge-like effect is concerned. Even if you're the cold, hard, steely type, this isn't as helpful as you might think -- you may be blocking out the bad, but you're also blocking out the good you need to bolster your spirit. As children, however, few Empaths have a clue as to how to prevent the unwanted absorption of other's emotions. This means that each encounter with the person perpetrating the abuse is going to result in experiencing everything they're experiencing as well. This can cover quite a broad range of emotions; anger, guilt and confusion often being prevalent. Add these to the mix when a child is already feeling scared, guilty, angry and confused on their own, and you can probably imagine how difficult it can be to sort your own feelings out when you're not even sure who's feelings you're actually experiencing.


Try to remember it's a lesson for them, too.

Few victims will want to hear this, but most people who victimize others feel badly about it. They feel guilt, confusion, hurt and all kinds of pain in spite of what they do. This does not make it right, or even understandable, but it does make them human. At the end of the day, those people are still a part of Source -- they are a part of you, whether you can accept that or not. They are not bad people, they have simply made bad decisions; and you had better believe that you've made some substantially bad decisions in other incarnations of your own. We all have. I don't believe that anyone comes here with the deliberate intention to harm others in any capacity. I believe they chose a set of circumstances prior to their birth and wound up biting off more than they could chew. I think these people thought they would be stronger, that they would be more capable of maintaining the right path and avoiding the wrong temptations, and I sincerely believe their souls end up more pained by the experience than ours.


Let it go and let yourself evolve.

You came here to experience life as profoundly as you could. Sexual abuse can be a devastating thing to experience, but once you have reached that place where you can look back on it and see it for what it really was -- one experience in a larger collection of lifetimes -- you can finally learn how to forgive and move on. You didn't come here to be a victim forever. You didn't come here to wallow in emotional turmoil. You didn't come here to spend all of your time hating someone less spiritually evolved than yourself. You can only blame your unhappiness on past events for so long -- the responsibility for your present and future happiness is yours, and yours alone. Yes, it requires a shift in consciousness, an elevation of the spirit; but you can do it.

You really, really can.

Love, Freya